The Time I Accidentally Walked into a Preppy Holiday

My body has been having a bit of a hissy fit with me lately.  Sometime last week my right knee started aching, a sustained dull ache that has now morphed into a feeling of broken glass.  I don’t know what I did to it.  It could have been the walks or the fact that it rained all of last week. It could been when I was rolling around on the garage floor the week before, painting the guest bedroom bookcase.  Whatever I did, I have royally pissed off my knee.  I am trying my best to make it happy and it seems to be most happy when I am sitting at my desk- so I thought I should use the time wisely and actually blog.

Sunday morning I woke up to my cat Bailey “gently” tapping at my head and eyeballs, like he does most mornings when I dare sleep past 7 am.  Sometimes I can tuck and roll and avoid him for another half hour and other times I relent and get up to feed him and Hitch.  That day I relented and decided to use the extra time to run some morning errands before everyone else in town woke up.  I needed to get some vitamins for my knee and some breakfast stuff anyway.  It was before 8:45 and it was ridiculously quiet, even the church crowd had not begun to trickle into the streets.  I was headed to Target for what I suspected would be a quick trip, but when I pulled into the parking lot I found all of the cars that had been missing in the streets.  The parking lot was full! I racked my brain for why there would be so many people, it wasn’t a holiday that I knew of.  There was a large church across the street so momentarily I thought maybe people park over at Target for the early service to miss the chaos that is the church parking lot, but I saw people coming out of Target. Huh?

The car I parked next to had it’s lights on, but didn’t seem to have a passenger.  When I got out to look at the license plate to report it in the store, I saw that a teenage boy was sitting in the backseat with his feet up clicking away on his Smartphone.  I preceded inside and saw a few women coming out with bags of Spring colored pillows, once again I thought holiday I was not aware of where entertaining is involved?   I saw a ton of women inside, mostly mothers with teenage daughters.  The line for the Starbuck’s that’s inside Target was over a dozen deep, something I had never seen there.  It led me to wonder if maybe there was some sort of Mother/Daughter thing going on for one of the schools.  A cashier at a grocery store last week had mentioned it was Prom at his high school that weekend.  Maybe it was some kind of Post-Prom ritual that exist down here to keep the kids in line.

I went to collect my shopping list items and every so often I would see a group of females chatting (some with raised voices) and waiting to talk to employee after employee  I heard bits of conversations about emails and online this or that, and that they couldn’t find something.   Maybe it was a Flash Sale?

Since none of things I usually get there seemed to be on this sale I picked up my vitamins and breakfast stuff and waited in line to be checked out.  I noticed the carts around me were full to the brim of some very (ugly) bright colors and patterns on clothes, purses, and pillows.

The couple in front of me seemed to be on the same early morning quest I was on.  They too had a small basket and not one pastel colored item was in it.

“Do you know what’s going on?” I asked them.

The cashier said, rather exhaustedly, “The Lilly Pulitzer line was released this morning.”
As apparently I was supposed to know what this meant I looked back to couple in front of me and said, “I’m sorry, who?”  They both burst out laughing.  The husband said he didn’t know, the wife had heard of her before but didn’t know why it was happening here.  They had the same theory about the church parking lot overflow and like me expected to have the store pretty much to themselves.  We all talked about the hilarity of us all accidentally walking into a mob on what was apparently some sort of historic shopping experience with no idea it was even happening.  I guess a good comparison would be going to see a movie on the day a Star Wars or a Harry Potter movie comes out, with gaggles of people in costume camped out and you go to the box office and ask for a ticket to see “Ghost Dog.”

With this new knowledge I looked around at the other shoppers and now I could see the frenzy in their eyes and satisfaction from their finds in their carts.  I saw a few things wrung up and I will be quite honest, it was not my cup of tea.  Loud, ugly patterns that made the shoppers coo over each other’s purchases with a fake enthusiasm of jealousy.  It was kinda sick.

As I was being checked out a women pushed her overstuffed cart of 60s-LSD-trip-hullitations-from-your-mother’s-house styled items into my side and kept going like she had just hit an orange cone in a driving simulator.  I didn’t yell, but I’m sure I made a noise because it caused me to shift all of weight to my jacked up knee and every time I have had to do that it has not been a silent action. It was her daughter, who couldn’t have been more than 15, that apologized to me and asked if I was okay as her mother hauled her items onto the next conveyer belt.  The daughter told the mother she had hit me, the mother yelled back an aloof apology that made me want to blurt our that it was I who was so sorry to have interrupt her path to a consumeristic orgasm with my mere existence-but I didn’t 🙂 Instead I collected my bags and maneuvered around all of the other carts and made it outside, only to find more women hoisting their purchases out of their bags to show their friends and neighbors that they had (coincidentally) run into, thus blocking another escape (I mean exit).

I got home and filled Honey in on my adventures in English Muffin procurement and looked up this Lilly Pulitzer, who I found out is known as “The Queen of Prep”.  It explained a few things, but I still don’t get the obsession.  Then throughout the day I saw the reports of the chaos that had ensued at the store and the website over the release and making fun of the people that bought the items (which I know I totally just did too).  And while I tease I feel that I must add this… All of us get excited over something or someone, and that’s okay.  We’re all a little different in what will make us wake up early on a Sunday morning to enjoy.  But I think we need to remember in our excitement that it is just stuff when comes down to it, and that we should not get so taken away in the frenzy that we forget ourselves.

In a few months when the items that Mother I mentioned bought are pushed to the backside of the closet or the pillows get stained, they will be gone and replaced.  But I have feeling the impression of the fashion trends of Spring 2015 will fade much faster in the daughter’s mind than the memory of her mother hitting someone and not caring.  It may be subconscious but more than likely it will be there. Like I mentioned there were a lot of mothers and teen daughters there and I’ll bet all of the daughters were noticing how their mother’s were acting in the situation.  So take from that what you will. 😉

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